Still not having 100% concentration in final preparation yet despite 2 days in library. I just need more time i guess but is good at least the start is made. Arr.. final exam is less than a month away. Which means holidays will start soon and will be back to malayisa soon. I am now having a mix of feeling about coming hols. Hahaha... i am so bad! Anyway finally make my decision to go back by end of nov and hopefully there is still sit for me to switch as the previous booking is on mid dec. Ok.. i am so bored. Bye!

Is friday again today! Another week shall gone soon. My midsem break on last week had ended and now another self break is ending soon too.. Anyway this break is great but abit tiring.
I went to melbourne with my sister who came over sydney during her working leave. And she is spending another week with me here in sydney after back from melbourne. But will be few days left. Holidays are always great but quite tiring for this time. Maybe because we dint go in the right time where the weather are suck during our days in melbourne.
Anyway is nice to explore new places always. Visited alot of places in australia. Some place are great and nice but not all.
It's week 10 of uni now. I start to worry bout my studies after coming back from the break. And mind start thinking weird question without proper answer like those days. I really think becoz i am old dyy!!! I just hate thinking so much! But i cant control. Those irritating issue just pop up in the brain. It's actually good to think and work your brain sometimes. And u just need to find out the future path. But i am just lazy to think slowly and get the answer. i am type who like to just ask others rather than working out myself. Haha..
Sometime we just need to figure out the way ourself. Others just cant help on that! I will get myself save! THankz for the concern =)

I am so depending

Lonely, bored is the feeling of mine here daily sitting in front of my laptop as i get home. Home sick?? i guess so. i just cant give any reason to deny for this moment. I always think i am good and independent enough and leaving home would not be a problem. My thinking seems to be wrong. I am missing the noise of home. The face of my family. My time with my brothers, fighting, arguing moment. Hahaha...

And my lovely brother is leaving to UK today. So, we wont have chance to meet when i get home during December break. Both us finally get the opportunity we dreaming and hope that we been holding since young. Seems like we really grow up now and its time to be independent. I just have this feeling and thought this moment suddenly because i dun think i am actually independent even i had spend 1 and half semester here. But dont u think human cant just be totally independent in live. We just cant live alone! But friend around did look so tough and independent here. I am so admired on them and JEALOUS! So.. can i be like them?? Can i?? haha... i dun think so!!!

I need to start finding my dream and ambition. stop dreaming around. Consider my path of life in the future. Make the fullest use of my opportunity studying in sydney. Start deciding on my own, be confident. Stop begging help from friends. Shit.. so moody again. eh.. I must be optimistic!
Whatever, all least should get some help for 3616 asign 1st for now. Keekeke..

Good luck lai! Hope u can get a good life in UK. Not something like mine! =p Hopefully u can hold your dream tight and achieve it. I will always feel proud of u! Hehehe....

I really need to balance up my study and life. Still feeling hard to put more proper effort in my study. I know very well my problem but i just cant control myself. Feel really guilty sometimes. Nobody can actually help but myself. I clearly know this. So, good luck Thiam Leong. Hahaha....

Anyway, the great and satisfaction life i am having lately is just awesome. Despite the guilt, i really enjoying non-stop. I still have quite some works to be accomplish at this moment but i just cant concentrate myself on them. Whatever..

Suddenly kind of missing my family.. zzz
Shall call back.

Best lovely friends

Evelyn = the pretty birthday girl.


So.. i had a wonderful yesterday night.
But the birthday dinner yesterday for evelyn seems not that perfect for everyone.I hope it's not true and i just feel it wrongly.
Anyway it was a really good and great night for me after so long wanted a dinner again with those 1st knew bunch of girls in sydney. Friends of mine should know i am kind of easy going person and always "anything" in making decision.(hope i am right) I just wan all friends to enjoy when we hanging out so i would rather let the others decide. Somehow maybe i should help decide and plan more for yesterday night dinner. Although it really seems weird when sometime me a only guys hang out with 4 girls. I just want to be same to be with all friends, guy or girl. I just enjoy being with people and making up some jokes and games to bright up our life.
Just for you to know, majority of close friends of mine in UNSW so far are female and another group of friend from UTS are male. So, to survive in UNSW i did need able to cope and stay with those girls. Hehehe... And i hope my appearance around u girls dun make any bad.
So all these bunch of friends in UNSW are those more "guai"?? type. Haha.. wat's the word. Hmm... maybe say those having more discipline life person. So after dinner around 930 some still have other plan and others need to go back.
Since is still early for me, i decide so go chill at Tim house. We then have some games with drink. And i then met up evan to catch bus back together around 12.
So..
17 August a nice day for me after all. Having Great best lovely accompanies.

Week 2 ended

So my holidays ended 2 weeks ago and this mean the week 2 of uni ended.
Did nothing much during the hols beside being a really bad boy. Nvr able to discipline myself to do any beneficial stuff in the hols.
Anyway, what past is gone. And i am back to uni and study life. Still slacking all this time even the uni started until today. It get so hard for me to start. Never get myself prepare for any class i went for this 2 weeks.
And for all u people in uni course now should understand the speed of uni and we just cant get slack and away from classes too far. There will be hell lot for u to catch up by then. I actually not even look through the course outline till today.
I really feel so hard to sit and study. Haha.. and thank god i finished my 1st week account lecture and i get started!!!! Hopefully i can persist and be consistent. still got other 3 subject to catch up.. Sien..
I really worry on my own attitude here to get myself discipline. I am no more a small boy and so deserve my freedom and right to decide my life now. And i really hope i wouldn't disappointed my parent who send me so far here. ARRRR!!!! life is just tough. And i think the subject for this semester should be fine for me and hopefully so. ok... i am out. i must major WORK HARD + minor play hard this semester. Get both done..

My result was out last thursday and i only know after shazwi call and tell me. But was out that evening with friends for dinner and movie- Harry porter . So din get to check 1st hand. Anyway the result wasnt tat good overall but got a really big surprise by passing my actuarial statistic 2002. And it definitely enough for everything. I never even dream of passing this subject as i really cant do in the exam. Anyway even with the pass i never gona to continue majoring actuarial.

Harry porter 5 was one of the worst show i ever watch in sydney. Haha.. i believe most people will agree with me. Maybe the previous was just too good or the story had to be film in this part was rather suck.

Start too feel sick on saturday as my usual problem sore throat is back. =(
And getting fever as well. After taking panadol for 2 day the ill i still dont seems to recover. So have to waste money to go for doctor again. Haiz.. my wallet is bleeding as well. Hahaha...

Anyway with the antibiotic suggested by the doctor, i m kind of well dy by today. So at least the money worth spending. Since feeling better today, i decide to go Eastgarden and hang around there as i never been there but often hear from friend and for some fresh air as well rather sitting at home hiding in the room. But after walking for some time only i start to feel weak just becoz i m actually not fully well yet. And feeling abit hungry as i have not taken my lunch yet. So, i walk around the food court to get some food. As i was queuing, i actually feel some1 touch my shoulder but though i might just being blur due to the sick and so lazy to bother. Until i heard a familiar sweet voice. Haha.. so shock for me .
Its Evelyn, a nice, cute girl i knew in sydney. Suppose to have meet her ytd with another friend if i wasnt sick. Then i realise this is the place she use to say she working. Been really long time since we last meet. Since the actuarial exam. Haha... hmm.. i think she did look different. But i cant tell out how. lolx.. of i just still sick or blur. Haha.. kk.. dinner time.. bye!

Holiday....

It had been sometimes since the previous blog. Not that i was so busy till couldnt get myself like 20min here. I have just nothing much to share. All i had for the last few weeks is just study and study. Anyway its over and i m not going to talk bout it again. It's my holiday now!!! =)

My last exam was on last friday. Arr.. so 1 week of my holiday gone. Been really relaxing after the final exam. Doing nothing but enjoying life. Living without any responsibility and work. All was just sleep, eat, hanging out and movie!!! Really all great time. Although i never have any plan to travel to any place with frens but it still ok for me because all i wan is only the freedom out of responsibility(= being really lazy doing nothing). Hahaha...

I spent some great time with frens although it just hanging around some same spot i had been because there is really nothing much in sydney. It somehow just a city even like KL. Anyway my holiday is good so far. Some frens actually recommended that i should go for some partime jobs and i did know i shall somehow to earn some since i m so free but i just wan to get some nice time for myself here 1st. So far i haven go for any as i plan even b4 i come because my last semester was really screw up. Hmm.. but it's not that easy to get a job anyway.

I still having sleeping problem. I just couldnt have a nice sleep. I got no idea of why. I just need to force myself hard to get into sleep. Need to be really super tired for me to fall sleep. And so much tiring dream during my sleep. That dun make me feel good. Ha.. watever i still survive but the only problem is the panda eye. Hahaha....

Bye!!!

I am just too weak!!!

Next monday will be having my 1st final paper and i am sick here now. Sorethroat + fever. This is really suck man. My body immunization system is just too weak all this while. Always get sick easily. I know myself well that f i couldnt get enough of sleep or having sore throat then the probability of me falling sick or getting fever will be dam high. Hahaha...
And i think this is the reason for me getting sick now as well. I was very tired and feeling sick(not yet) on saturday after coming back from library around 6. So after my dinner, bath and stuff i went into bed around 9. But i awake at 12am man and couldnt get back into sleep until 6 although i try to lay on the bed at 3 to 3.30 . Then like usual couldnt really sleep well as lor of dream are there disturbing and i woke around 12.(Not enough =P) Haiz, and the worst is its raining on the Sunday. So after the rain get slow and i though its going to stop i change myself and get to the library. On my way the rain get heavier and i had to run and stop by some under root but was wet at the time dy. So was stuck in the middle of the way. After around 30 min when the rain start to slow down i decide to run back to my house cancel the library plan. But the rain was not that slow as expected and the wind is blowing against my path. So turn me into "chicken in the soup".

Unlucky me!!!!
Hope all the bad will end and the best will there during my exam.
HEHE!!

2 week

Exam is only 2 week away now.
And there goes my 1st sem in UNSW.
I have not able to really concerntrade myself to prepare for the exam like what i use to do back in my home ever since form 3. I just absolutely notice and realize it. The environment is just different. I use to hate study when i was really young. But i start understanding the important of education and set myself some target to do well in my study in my secondary school. I was all this while lucky and success in my exam. Not i m trying to boast about myself here but that's actually something true. But beside lucky i did spent lots hard work on it too. And i m really happy that all my hard work yield.

I always believe that if one work hard there is no way for him to fail any exam. In fact i gone through with flying colour. This make me my thinking a fact to me. But ever after the 2nd actuarial quiz, i lost myself. I turn negative, pessimistic. The thinking of failing the subject keep appear in my mind until i really able to settle it down now recently.
i really hope i could my best now but i m now not the me in malaysia. I couldnt just learn thing like those day and discipline myself. I would have done more in those day when i m in suck difficult position. hmm... its just 2WEEk away my final, the mood is still not here.. Haha. i think only myself couldnt understand it.
OGOSH!!! its not i din study and prepare any yet.I did try preparing but just still couldnt get the confident like those days. sigh... And i know wat i got now its really not enough i need to push myself more into revision.

Hmm.. hopefully the confident and feeling shall back soon b4 the exam..
xD
bYeeeeeee!!!!

Bothering

Aiks!!!
Its early morning around 2.30am now. Its nothing special to see me still awake at this time but not the case today. I was so tired last night till lazy to go for this movie i was expecting- The pirate of caribbean 3. I was more interested to this than spiderman because i had gone to the 2 earlier of this and i m just too tired just now so din join Erica for the movie.( Erica--I m so sorry not turning up after promising) Anyway i did went for the spider movie and its actually good as well. And now i hope pirate of caribbean 3 would be as good as the both the earlier 1.

Fine back to my reason of blogging for today.
I actually went to the bed as early 9 pm just now. Then not really knowing the reason i awake around 1.30am. Din really feel like waking up coz got no idea wat to do as i m lazy to study. Hahaha... but i cant get back into my dream till now 2.30 am.

SOMETHING is bothering me... Haha.. Its not about study this time... i already manage to overcome the stress of study i guess although my final is now really near-- 3 weeks aways.xD (holiday will be soon too)

..................

Hmm... din really feel like puting the SOMETHING here now. Srry. Dun really wan share it yet. =p

I should get back to my dream fast so able to study tomorrow.. I doubt i could now. Half way in the movie already. Hehe..
Bye!!!

Ya well...
Finally, i hand in the drop form today.
BYEE Actuarial. Somehow feel relief now. After calling my parent and confirming that i will submit the form and drop the subject, the form was handed. Shall turn into a new life now, without the subject. There flew my burden all this time. THAnks Mum and Dad for understanding me and my family who are always there for me. Thankz to all the friend who supported me and giving their hand when i was in trouble. Thankz
to every1.
Haha... y is all the thank there??
I still got long way to go till i graduate.. =p

But somehow the duration shall turn shorter as compare to majoring actuarial.
Another good thing for me.. Hehe..

Make a phone call to John and HanLin this afternoon. Long time din hear their sound aso. And unlikely we will able to meet in short term. Really missing my old time with all these nice friends.. Glad to have them once exist and go through my life together. A more meaningful and colourful 1. I have always realize their good and appreciate their existence. But just feel to write in here. XD


Bye!!

My brain is really super lost and disrupted now...
I really cant bear with the actuarial subject i m doing...
No matter how hard i try and try i still have 0 knowledge in my brain.
And i m tired and sick of complaining. After talking with my mum on last friday, i decide to drop the subject and will start some subject for majoring accounting by next sem. I dun wan to try study and learn anymore, put any effort in this subject. I know i will never get any return for all my hardwork. I will still FAIL the subject.

So i went and talk with the admin staff of the faculty today about this dropping. Aikss.. i was told the dateline of dropping is over and if it will makes no different to drop by now or i continue the grade will still stay fail. Haiz.. i really lost and no idea now... The problem for now is the marks of fail will be there where if i continue i can make a difference in the marks where the fail will be in some higher marks if i manage to earn them in the final instead of my current mark accumulated from the quizes. Ogosh.. wat am i suppose to do!!!

=( dinner time.. F*** off..

Not being a good boy for today..
TRying to study for Monday quizzes in the day as planned to go dinner today with Erica and her friends who will be introduced to me.. Haha...
It was a cooling day and was so lazy to get up this morning. So i continue lying on the bed after awake for like 30 minute. Then get some breakfast and prepare myself to library.
By the time at library it was aldy 12. Been staying for like 3 hours there but couldnt realy concentrate as normal. So noting much into the brain. I got no idea y is this happening and maybe its just too hard. Well so should meet up jacky and seek for help tomorrow, hehe...
After the 1612 class around 5:30, Erica, Hong and I went to Erica friends house to meet them up. And found out the place is just opposite of Hong house.. The world is just small sometimes..
So get to know this 3 new friends from Sabah, Veron, Ivan, and May Ling if i remember and spell them correctly.. Haha, i am suck in remembering new friends name.
So we went to city for japanese food today. Have some nice and funny chat all thankz to Hong.
After dinner Hong decide to fetch us to Sydney bridge to have a look. Never know wat to do and so just pass through the place and we go home.
Somehow a nice day today to get more new friends. XD

Wah!!! Had a really enjoy weekend without any study and books. Went for spiderman after my friday quiz and went out lepak on saturday night again.
And now, is sunday night. =(

There goes my weekend. Hmm.. anyway need to start concentrating back in study after this. As i din really do well for the past quizes..

So.. good luck to myself and workhard!!!

I dont really have idea what to blog for today. But since have not posted any for the last few days and just finish another quiz, i would like just to write something on here to make sure this blog of my is being use consistently. =)

Noting much different for my life lately. Only busy preparing for all the test ahead beside watching some series. And this is all what i have DAILY!!!

The best thing for last week is i had is got to know more and closer to a really nice friend from China, JACKY.. A really nice, friendly, helpful and smart guy. Help me alot for my matlab test. Haha.. this is not the only reason i been praising his virtue here but there is more on his personality. And i know i will definitely need more help from him coming. THANKZ alot Jacky. Haha...

Been raining for the last few days i and really hate them. The weather turn so cold. so i bought a heater back to survive here. LOLx.( its only autumn now) I shall really start to get use with this coolness to make sure the winter not going to be so terrible.

I phoned back to my house and talk to my grandma last night with the extra credit left on my cellphone. Ogosh... i really miss her so much.. I really wish i could work hard and graduate soon as a return to her for all her support on me. Hehe..

Bye!

What a EXAM!!

I just finish my fin 1613 exam... The stuff from the book we learn is not tat hard to understand and so i dun really worry about this subject. In fact is the most confident subject for me out of all.

But today exam is just terrible. The question are so complicated... really need to twist our brain fully to answer them. Hmm.. guess wat?? I only finish myself with 17 question out of 30 and all the other i cant think of the way to asnwer and i just duno them.. by the way is a MCQ paper.. so i get to shoot and hopefully my aiming is good.. lolx.. this is wat i did for a confident subject.. Haiz.. but i dun really feel sad now actually... i think shuldnt be problem for me at least to pass.. by the way, i really dun have those kind of MUST score spirit after i start doing my uni HERE... Coz everything seems really hard... and i jsut hope i pass through ALL of them... and graduate without any fail..

Hahaha... actually i so far i have no problem in my finance subject.. but actuarial i really duno how i can go through it... this subject is just so alien to me.. couldnt understand how the theory and concepts go... hmm.. but i have make up my mind.. i shuld keep myself so pessimistic.. So i must work hard and maybe then i might start LOVE it, hopefully.. XD

Hmm.. i actually start to really feel lonely and miss my home back in malaysia now.. OMG!!! hahaha... after next week i will be here for only the 2nd month. but now i m missing my lovely family their voice and the days we spent together.. haiz... but there is nothing can be done... i will have to bear it till December only i will go back by then... hmm...

BYE!!!!

Double suprise!!!

The 1st class today i had is Actuarial lecture. So just as usual i go to the class although i know will not understand anything becoz i already lost far behind of the subject. The class is just noisy as usual b4 the lecturer start anything.. And it doesn't turn silence even the lecture started... This is kind of usual too as ppl tend to use some times to really silence after the class start normally.. And today the lecturer just can bear us and was so angry till he pack up and left the room. And so the class for today is ended and ppl start packing to leave so do us. It actually make no different for ppl like me becoz i nvr learn any in the class but for those like M, E ,K and (Iy maybe), they actually hope the class to be on.. hmm... so is just too bad for them.

So then we actually have 3 hrs of break instead of the normal 2. After the break is my 1613 tut which i expect we will be geting back our quiz paper. But i walk in late and the tutor are there giving the tut answer just as normal. Coz i m late so i actually have to sit somewhere else from my fren in the class. And i know i m actually wrong where i m not going to get it back by today. I actually dun have any expectation on this quiz coz i duno how to do and just simply taking 1 of the given formula and used it to answer the question.

So after the class i meet up my fren and there the surprise come. Erica actually get me a belated present and a really nice cute birthday card. Haha... i Really have to thankz her again here.. hehe..

Then we go for the lecturer and we were told that the marks of the quiz will be out by today on WebCT. So after the class, went to buy some glossary on the way back with K. Hmm... and i reach my laptop after everything... Checking my marks... WOW another suprise.. i got 7 out of 10.. Haha.. actually i din do tat well but just the paper we did is kind of hard compare to the others so our marks actually got scale up.. Anyway who cares.. i love the marks.. hahaha

Stupid quiz...

Dont really have any special to blog out for today..
But if there is any.. then it will be the quiz today..
The quiz paper i got was the yellow 1 (2 set of them another was pink). The question did come out similar to the past 1 i try. Is the same format and type of question instead. So if u tried and able to do the past year 1, u will definitely no problem on this. SCORE IT!!!! And there is only 4 question on the quiz and will be pretty easy for anyone to remember it. Somehow one of the question is on proofing the answer which i found the hardest to understand and do. But i finally kind of like understand it b4 the quiz after thousand time of reading. Haha... however it was just too bad for me that the stupid yellow paper i was given today come out with this question, which i duno the answer therefore noway of continue in proofing for me. And there the question gone. The other 3 question i guess will not have problem. -D
After the quiz the tutor actually discuss the quiz question with us and i found out god damm the pink proofing question is something i able to do. And this is just like the 2nd quiz of mine where i was given the blue instead of yellow 1 where the yellow is something more easier and i know. Anyway the quiz is now over and i think i will score something better than the previous 2 one so there will still be some improvement. Haha... A good start in improving. =p

Around 5pm i guess after my last class for today i walk out the uni through the main walkway instead of the side shorter way back to my house becoz i need to buy something to cook for tonight dinner. The wind is there blowing as i walking and thinking wat to buy. Due the the cool wind and hesitating on my choice of dinner, i actually nod down my head looking on the floor while walking. Then duno where this 2 blind guy from the front walk to meet and like almost knock into me. So i look up and saw this girl walking after them (coz the 2 guy was on the side dy)... Hmm how come this girl look so familiar... then i look at the 2 guy.. lolx.. is my fren from UTS. And this girl is on of the guy gf come for holiday for 10 days time. Hahaha.. so blur man me. They came for this futsal game in my uni and so i accompany them for the game. And i went home after tat.

ARR!!! while blogging this.. my fren told me tat the mark for the acturial stat quiz is out...
hmm b4 checking on the marks i know i sure fail. And so the target for me is 40/100. Haha..
if i got anything of this or better than this, i will feel really happy. Hmm i check... i got ar!!!!
38/100... haha.. 2 more mark to my target.. lolx..
Haha.. nvmla.. must study harder next time...
i think those who read my 1st blog can understand me now for doing SUCK in study...
Hehe.. tat all for today... time to study.. ciaoz...

The born of this blog

hmm.. of course b4 everthing start, i would like to thank to the mother of this blog=waikit.
haha... coz i nvr know the way of creating a blog and he does it for me.

Well.. let me start something now..
Today is the last day of my 1 week easter break.. how nice if there is actually another week...
Haiz.. then i will have more time to play and catch up my study...
My situation in Aussie now is really fine and great in live.. but suck in study!!!!
Havin wonderful fren around who gave me dam alot of help...
i m havin like 2 geng of fren here in sydney..
1 geng of fren from UTS with 1 primary and 1 secondary with their buddies...
another is from my uni UNSW , 1 alevel fren and 3 of her good frens..
of course there is other coming 1 which be close soon like Erica, kenneth and....

Was lost no way in my study since i came...
and so this holiday will be my best chance to catch up in my studies...
but i m just too lazy.. and i really dun wan to fill my life with only everyday of book..
so been enjoying my holiday since it started on the 5th of april till 11th of april..
where i finally start to content with of the fun i deserve to have..
So started my revision on 11th of April and dun plan to any outing more...
and even on the 12th of april which was my birthday( somehow i actually got surprise from my nice, cute frens who actually baked some muffin and bring it to celebrate with me EARLY in the morning... hehehe.. i really love all of u so much... XD ) and till today15th of april.
hmm i think i can be satisfy of my achievement so far.. where i kind of catch up in 3 subject out of 4 i m doing... where the another actuarial statistic subject i m still far way lost...
Today is really a horrible day... i have been doing nothin beside study coz tmrw will be my math quiz.. And this time finally i really able to like know SOMETHING (it's really just something) about this subject after all hard work of today...

kind of long blog dy for me who just start with this... seems like a good start for me..
hahaha....
tat all for today will back to study soon. -)
and Good luck for tmrw!!!!!

some pictures

wee hoo

wee hoo